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AI🧠💰 Bot Begone! Cloudflare Wants to Charge AI Every Time It Breathes on Your Website 💸🤖
July 4, 2025

🧠💰 Bot Begone! Cloudflare Wants to Charge AI Every Time It Breathes on Your Website 💸🤖

Cloudflare just put you on a leash… and they’re charging you rent. That's right, the internet’s favorite invisible bouncer (aka Cloudflare), which literally powers 20% of the internet (flex 💅), has pulled a giga-brain move and dropped a whole new paywall for bots. It’s called “Pay Per Crawl” and no, it’s not a new OnlyFans tier for spiders. 🕷️ This new system is basically Cloudflare looking at AI companies and…
Technology🚨Tech Bro Buys a Bank (Kinda) and Starts a Quiet Fintech Revolution from a Tiny Town Near Portland 🚨
July 4, 2025

🚨Tech Bro Buys a Bank (Kinda) and Starts a Quiet Fintech Revolution from a Tiny Town Near Portland 🚨

Okay so—imagine you’re a tech bro with Stripe stock options and a dream. Now imagine you wake up one morning and go, “You know what would be super chill? Owning a bank.” Well, welcome to the Darragh Buckley Cinematic Universe™. This isn’t some finance cosplay—Darragh was literally Stripe’s FIRST employee, and now he’s out here collecting banks like Pokémon cards. And baby, he just caught a new one: Twin City…
Technology🚨 Trump Yeeted Vital Health Sites Because of “Gender Ideology” and a Judge Just Said: Bro, That’s Illegal 🚨
July 3, 2025

🚨 Trump Yeeted Vital Health Sites Because of “Gender Ideology” and a Judge Just Said: Bro, That’s Illegal 🚨

We’ve got ourselves a spicy case of presidential button-mashing that nuked half the internet (ok, health.gov edition) and now a judge is out here laying the legal smackdown like it’s Phoenix Wright: Executive Order Edition. So here’s what went down: On Day Freakin’ ONE in office, Trump dropped a deluge of executive orders like a kid mashing “A” on a Game Boy. One of them demanded that all government health…
AIZuckerbot Wants to Be Your BFF, Therapist, DJ, and Movie Nerd—Whether You Like It or Not
July 3, 2025

Zuckerbot Wants to Be Your BFF, Therapist, DJ, and Movie Nerd—Whether You Like It or Not

Imagine you’re just vibin’ on Messenger, maybe thirst-texting your situationship or arguing with your friend about whether Shrek 2 is the greatest sequel of all time. Suddenly… BAM 💥 — your phone lights up with a DM from an overly peppy AI named “The Maestro of Movie Magic” who’s like: “Hi bestie! 😇 Just checking if you’ve discovered any hot new soundtracks lately! Need some recs? I GOT YOU. 🍿🎶”…
🚨 New App Just Dropped and It’s Basically Hot Instagram for Nerds 🚨
July 3, 2025

🚨 New App Just Dropped and It’s Basically Hot Instagram for Nerds 🚨

“Flashes” Is Like If Instagram and Bluesky Had a Baby and That Baby Was Hot, Confusing, and Slightly European Moisturize those eyeballs because a brand-new photo-sharing app called Flashes just crash-landed into the App Store like a shirtless tech bro at Burning Man. Built on top of Bluesky (yes, that Twitter clone where everyone’s profile pic is a frog smoking a cigarette), Flashes is here to turn your sweaty gym…
Technology💀HACKERS SAY “BYE FELICIA”?! Hunters International Ransomware Gang Shuts Down in Mysterious, Kinda Suspicious Exit 💻💣
July 3, 2025

💀HACKERS SAY “BYE FELICIA”?! Hunters International Ransomware Gang Shuts Down in Mysterious, Kinda Suspicious Exit 💻💣

The hacker squad formerly known as Hunters International just rage-quit the cybercrime game like your little cousin rage-quitting Fortnite after getting clapped in Tilted Towers. On their dark web breakup blog (yes, that’s a thing now), the digital gremlins announced, “After careful consideration and mysterious ‘developments’ we refuse to elaborate on, we’ve decided to shut down our lil' hacker club.” They didn’t spill any real tea, which is hacker code…
⚠️ CapCut’s Terms of Service Are WILD AF… Or Are They? 🫣📜👀
June 22, 2025

⚠️ CapCut’s Terms of Service Are WILD AF… Or Are They? 🫣📜👀

“Congratulations, you just sold your soul for a transition effect.” We’re diving headfirst into the legal spaghetti pile that is CapCut’s Terms of Service, and yes, it’s somehow more confusing than your crypto portfolio. If you’ve ever clicked “I Agree” faster than you swipe on Raya, this one’s for you. So What TF Is Going On?! TikTok creators are panicking harder than a gamer with 1% battery and no charger…
AI📉 LinkedIn’s AI Tool Just Flopped Harder Than Your Last Crypto Investment – CEO Spills the Awkward Tea ☕🤖
June 22, 2025

📉 LinkedIn’s AI Tool Just Flopped Harder Than Your Last Crypto Investment – CEO Spills the Awkward Tea ☕🤖

Welp, guess even LinkedIn’s AI couldn’t fake being interesting enough for the corporate Hunger Games. LinkedIn CEO Ryan Roslansky just admitted that their shiny AI writing assistant—the one that’s supposed to make your “thought leadership” posts sound like Harvard essays—flopped harder than a Web3 dating app. 🫠 In a very “hey, at least I tried” moment with Bloomberg, Roslansky confessed: “It’s not as popular as I thought it would be,…
Technology🚨🔥 ADOBE JUST WENT FULL MEGA-BOSS MODE: FIRE(FLY) IN YOUR POCKET 🔥🚨
June 17, 2025

🚨🔥 ADOBE JUST WENT FULL MEGA-BOSS MODE: FIRE(FLY) IN YOUR POCKET 🔥🚨

Adobe just launched a Firefly app for iOS and Android and it’s straight-up unhinged in the best way possible. Your camera roll is about to become a war zone of chaotic creativity and cursed beauty. Once upon a time (aka like two months ago), Adobe dropped a spicy new Firefly web app — think Photoshop on psychedelics, but smarter. You could prompt it to turn your dumbest thoughts into visual…
🚨 SPOILER ALERT: ZUCK UNLOCKS NINJA MODE FOR THREADS POSTS 🥷📱
June 17, 2025

🚨 SPOILER ALERT: ZUCK UNLOCKS NINJA MODE FOR THREADS POSTS 🥷📱

– Threads Now Testing ‘Spoiler Text,’ Because Mark Zuckerberg Doesn’t Want You Crying Over Plot Twists at 3AM – Okay, deep breath: Meta just dropped the mic (and maybe a few plot bombs) because Mark “Code Daddy” Zuckerberg himself confirmed that Threads—aka Instagram’s chaotic little cousin with a journal—is now testing SPOILER TEXT. Yes, finally. Our digital diaries are getting stealth mode. 🤐 What Even Is Spoiler Text? Imagine sending…
🚨 Instagram AI is Going Absolutely Feral and Banning Everyone Like It’s the Hunger Games 🚨
June 17, 2025

🚨 Instagram AI is Going Absolutely Feral and Banning Everyone Like It’s the Hunger Games 🚨

Bro… Did You Just Get Banned for Breathing?! Because Same. Welcome to Instagram in 2025, where even existing peacefully might get your account yeeted into the abyss. Tech bros, gamers, gym rats, crypto hustlers, and that one guy selling protein powder and NFTs in DMs—nobody is safe. Over the past few weeks, Insta users have been mass-reporting a spontaneous digital purge that’s booting accounts harder than your ex after finding…
Technology🚨 ROBOT BODEGAS TAKE L.A. — Are Humans Canceled? 🚨
June 11, 2025

🚨 ROBOT BODEGAS TAKE L.A. — Are Humans Canceled? 🚨

The future of snacks just yeeted into Los Angeles and it’s serving Doritos via robot claw. Yes, you heard right — the age of human-free convenience stores is here and it’s being powered by apps, suction cups, and probably eldritch AI. Welcome to VenHub, the fully-automated, 24/7 snack shack from the year 3000 that just landed near LAX like a vending machine from Elon Musk's fever dream. 🎛️ ROBOTS BE…
SEO🚨 Google Just Nuked the Robots.txt Rulebook — Are Your Auto-Translated Pages About to Get Snitched On?! 🚨
June 11, 2025

🚨 Google Just Nuked the Robots.txt Rulebook — Are Your Auto-Translated Pages About to Get Snitched On?! 🚨

Google just rage-deleted part of its sacred scrolls (aka documentation) like it found its old MySpace poetry. Specifically, it yeeted the section that told you to block your “lol-worthy” auto-translated pages with `robots.txt`. RIP to that outdated advice. 🪦 But why tho? Turns out, Google's been on a glow-up arc. They’re now judging your content based on vibes—not whether it was written by a human, AI, or an overcaffeinated capybara…
💥BREAKING: Snapchat Just Dropped an $8.99 Lens+ Tier and It’s Basically the Metaverse’s Gym Membership💥
June 11, 2025

💥BREAKING: Snapchat Just Dropped an $8.99 Lens+ Tier and It’s Basically the Metaverse’s Gym Membership💥

Because obviously your eyeballs weren’t working hard enough. Snapchat is back at it again with the emotional damage — I mean subscriptions. Introducing: Lens+, the $8.99-a-month tier designed to take your selfie game from “eh” to “AI-generated demigod from the year 4040.” What’s Included? Chaos. Pure chaos. You thought $3.99 Snapchat+ was elite? That was baby mode. Lens+ is for real ones who want to flex holographic Bitmojis, unlock trippy…
AIApple’s New AI Models Are Here—and They’re Mid AF
June 10, 2025

Apple’s New AI Models Are Here—and They’re Mid AF

Apple has unveiled new AI models and… they are giving meh. Like, “my oat milk latte is slightly too warm” levels of disappointment. In a grand reveal that felt more like a soft whisper than a mic drop, Apple debuted its fresh-faced AI duo: Apple On-Device and Apple Server. One runs on your iPhone (aka in your purse), the other lurks in a data center somewhere deep inside a brushed-aluminum…
BREAKING: Threads Finally Stops Ghosting Us—DMs Are Coming (Cue the Confetti and Chaos)
June 10, 2025

BREAKING: Threads Finally Stops Ghosting Us—DMs Are Coming (Cue the Confetti and Chaos)

Threads—Meta’s slightly cooler, slightly confused cousin of Instagram—is finally getting what every app in the digital playground already has: a damn DM inbox. YES. It’s 2025, and Threads just realized we like to talk privately. GASP! Mark “I Invented Facebook While Wearing Flip-Flops” Zuckerberg announced today that Threads is testing a separate, standalone, gloriously isolated DM inbox. No more needing to teleport over to Instagram like it’s 2017 just to…
AIUK Lawyers in Hot AI Mess After Submitting Fake Court Cases: Judge Sharp Unleashes Legal Thunder
June 8, 2025

UK Lawyers in Hot AI Mess After Submitting Fake Court Cases: Judge Sharp Unleashes Legal Thunder

In what can only be described as Law & Order: AI Unit, the High Court of England and Wales has delivered a crisp legal backhand to lawyers who’ve been submitting spicy courtroom fan fiction courtesy of ChatGPT. Judge Victoria Sharp (whose name sounds like a sword and whose legal sass cuts just as deep) has had enough of legal professionals treating generative AI like a magic 8-ball in a barrister’s…
TechnologyiOS 19 (or iOS 26??): Apple’s Latest Update is Giving Facelift, Fashion Week, and Full-On Fever Dream
June 8, 2025

iOS 19 (or iOS 26??): Apple’s Latest Update is Giving Facelift, Fashion Week, and Full-On Fever Dream

iOS 19 is about to sashay into your life like it just got back from a silent retreat in the Swiss Alps, drank six green juices, and now thinks it's better than you. Except—plot twist—it’s not iOS 19 anymore. It might be called iOS 26, because Apple decided numbers are a social construct and now they’re on that “car model year” energy. Vroom vroom, baby, your iPhone is basically a…
TechnologyApple Loses Court Battle Over “Link Tax,” Developers Set Free Like Escaped Zoo Animals
June 6, 2025

Apple Loses Court Battle Over “Link Tax,” Developers Set Free Like Escaped Zoo Animals

🚨BREAKING: Apple just got told “no” by the court — like a toddler begging for one more episode of Bluey. In a move that sent shockwaves through Cupertino (and probably shattered a few iPhone screens from sheer rage), a U.S. court has officially denied Apple’s desperate Hail Mary attempt to keep charging developers a fee when users pay outside the App Store via those spicy little in-app links. Yes, guys.…
🚨BREAKING: Lefty Influencers Join Bluesky in Droves Without Breaking Up With X (Awkward!)
June 1, 2025

🚨BREAKING: Lefty Influencers Join Bluesky in Droves Without Breaking Up With X (Awkward!)

So, here’s the tea — according to the nerdy minds over at the Pew Research Center (you know, the data guys who live in spreadsheets and sadness), a bunch of left-leaning influencers have flocked to Bluesky like it’s the new VIP lounge at an afterparty… but get this — they’re still clinging onto their old flame, X (a.k.a. Twitter, a.k.a. Elon’s Digital Rollercoaster). Yes, that’s right. Influencers are basically doing…
AI🚨 BREAKING: Google Just Dropped a Local AI App Like It’s Hot — And Didn’t Even Tell Anyone?! 🚨
June 1, 2025

🚨 BREAKING: Google Just Dropped a Local AI App Like It’s Hot — And Didn’t Even Tell Anyone?! 🚨

Google just did the most Google thing ever: they casually yeeted a whole AI app into the world like it was tossing confetti at a robot wedding — and said literally nothing. No press release. No TikTok dance. Just a quiet, mysterious plop on GitHub like, “Oh hey. Here’s an app that lets you summon AI demons locally. No biggie.” Introducing: Google AI Edge Gallery™ (aka “Skynet Jr. with a…
TechnologyHow a Decade-Old Patent Dispute Could Shake Up Uber’s Business
May 30, 2025

How a Decade-Old Patent Dispute Could Shake Up Uber’s Business

A patent lawsuit that might sound like a niche legal issue could actually have massive implications for Uber — and potentially a whole host of other companies in the ridesharing and tech industries. Let’s break it down. The Lawsuit That Could Upset Uber’s Apple Cart Carma Technology, a company founded by Sean O’Sullivan back in 2007, is taking Uber to court. Why? Because Carma claims Uber is infringing on five…
TechnologyDOGE Leaves USIP Headquarters in a State of Disrepair: Water Damage, Vermin, and More
May 30, 2025

DOGE Leaves USIP Headquarters in a State of Disrepair: Water Damage, Vermin, and More

The United States Institute of Peace (USIP) is dealing with an unexpected mess after Elon Musk’s controversial "Department of Government Efficiency" (DOGE) took over its Washington, D.C. headquarters earlier this year. According to a recent sworn statement from USIP’s CEO, George Moose, the building was left in a state of disarray, with significant water damage, rats, roaches, and poor security after DOGE’s involvement. This shocking revelation comes just days after…
TechnologyApple Just Blocked $2 Billion in App Store Fraud Last Year—Here’s Why That Matters to You
May 27, 2025

Apple Just Blocked $2 Billion in App Store Fraud Last Year—Here’s Why That Matters to You

Just ahead of its big Worldwide Developers Conference (WWDC 2025), Apple dropped some eye-popping numbers about how it’s keeping the App Store safe—not just for developers, but for you, the everyday user swiping through apps on your iPhone. Let’s break it down. 🛡️ $2 Billion in Fraud Stopped—Just Last Year In 2024 alone, Apple says it blocked over $2 billion worth of fraudulent transactions on the App Store. And if…

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